This is the kind of sickening shit that women are reading today. On top of their maddening ridiculous sense of entitlement, you are supposed to act like a total pussy around them. My response to this: “Go buy a vibrator you bitch and go fuck yourself, your worthless turd” MY COMMENTS ARE IN RED AT THE END OF EACH PARAGRAPH AND REPRESENT MY OPINION OF THE CONTENT OF THIS DISGUSTING PIECE! Take a look at this nauseating shit ass article:
10 Things a Good Boyfriend Won’t Ask You to Do
A savvy boyfriend would never ask us to make him a sandwich while he plays armchair quarterback.
We’ve all been in relationships where, at times, we’ve felt more like a mom or a secretary than a significant other. While we understand that healthy relationships require compromises, we’ve compiled a list of favors that good boyfriends know better than to consistently request. If you’re constantly taking on any of the items on this list (especially with any hint of resentment), it’s time to get your guy to lend a hand.
#1. His laundry
Pairing your socks isn’t exactly our idea of a stay-at-home date, nor does living with you make us a 1950s housewife. A good compromise is for one partner to sort and start the laundry and the other to fold and put it away. Plus, studies show that helping around the house can increase intimacy. So, how ’bout that pile of dishes? If you clean up the sink while we tackle the living room, we’ll be more likely to cuddle (HERE WE ARE MAKING A DEAL FOR SEX AGAIN; GO FUCK YOURSELF BITCH).
#2. Buy gifts and cards for other people on his behalf
We’ll help when we’re out with you, but no, we won’t make a pit stop at Hallmark and Laura Ashley while we’re shopping with the girls. Just because we’re women doesn’t mean we’re automatically adept at figuring out your Aunt Martha’s dress size (NOR CAN YOU FIGURE ANYTHING THAT REQUIRES BRAINPOWER OUT, YOU MORON. DON’T ASK ME TO FIX YOUR CAR OR HOOK UP YOUR STEREO IF YOU CAN’T MAKE A STOP. IT’S ALL ABOUT YOU ISN’T IT, YOU LITTLE CUNT!)
#3. Plan an entire vacation without his help
When we ask you whether you’d rather spend our anniversary in Cabo or Vermont, we want you to express an actual preference, not to say, “Whatever, I’m happy with what makes you happy.” The same goes for the hotel, the airline, and the restaurant reservations. Letting us take the reins isn’t considerate, it’s just lazy and boring. Instead, make sure to divvy up the planning. We pick the location and hotel, you plan the activities (THIS ONE I AGREE WITH. A WOMAN SHOULD NEVER PLAN ANYTHING FOR A MAN. MAN UP, GRAB YOUR BALLS AND TELL THE BITCH WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO. DON’T BE A PUSSY. IF THE BITCH DOESN’T LIKE YOUR IDEA, KICK THE LITTLE CUNT TO THE CURB. ALSO SHE CAN PAY HER OWN WAY ON THE TRIP).
#4. Make him a sandwich
The refrigerator is 10 feet away and your game control has a pause button, so get up, stretch, and slap that ham and lettuce together by yourself. We don’t care if you’re “in the zone,” because apparently, you were out of it long enough to articulate your immediate need for a nibble. Maybe we’ll consider it if you agree to break from the game for 20 minutes, put on some coffee, and enjoy your afternoon snack with us. (YOU CONTROLLING MISERABLE CUNT! WHAT PURPOSE DO YOU SERVE EXCEPT BEING A BITCH?)
#5. Change your relationship status on Facebook
We believe our life outside of the Internet should speak for itself. On the off-chance that we break up, wouldn’t you rather tell your close friends in person, rather than have that ever-present broken heart appear on 500 people’s newsfeeds? Well, we would, so don’t even ask us to include our relationship status on Facebook in the first place. (WOMEN ON FACEBOOK ARE GENERALLY THERE LOOKING FOR ATTENTION SO WE SHOULD NOT EVEN HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU IF YOU ARE THERE, BUT BELIEVE ME, THE LAST THING I WANT TO DO IS TELL ANYONE, I AM IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU!)
#6. Be his wake-up call
Really, buy an alarm clock. Remembering a man’s nap and wakeup schedule should be an occasional favor, not an everyday obligation (I THINK I CAN GET UP MYSELF AND SO CAN MOST MEN. WE DON’T NEED YOU TO BE OUR MOMMY, YOU CONTROLLING TWAT).
#7. Hang out with his ex
Some women like befriending the ex, and others just want to satisfy their curiosity about her, but don’t pressure the ones who would rather keep a distance (ALL THE MORE REASON NOT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU TO BEGIN WITH).
#8. Keep up with his favorite shows
How would you like it if we made you religiously watch Desperate Housewives? Instead, let’s pick a show we both like and make sure we follow it together (WRONG! NO REASON TO WATCH TV WITH YOU EVER!).
#9. Lose weight
We’ll tone up for health purposes and for ourselves, but if you’re really concerned about the 5 lbs we gained over the holidays, don’t flat-out complain that we’re getting flabby. Instead, invite us to go biking with you or to take a yoga class together. Treat exercise as a fun activity we can do together instead of something that we should do just for you (IF YOU PUT ON WEIGHT WE WILL KICK YOUR ASS TO THE CURB IMMEDIATELY………….NO EXCUSES. TAKE THE DAMN FORK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH).
#10. Keep our hair long
Trust us, short hair is cute, fun, and just as feminine as back-length hair. Just look at Halle Berry, Audrey Tautou and Keira Knightley, circa 2005. It’s not as if we’re going to shave it off or sport one of Rihanna’s hairstyles, but even if we did, we hope you’d find us just as attractive (TOTALLY WRONG………YOU LOOK LIKE A BUTCH LESBIAN, THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF FEMININE. GETTING THE MESSAGE GUYS? AMERICAN WOMEN WANT TO ACT LIKE AND LOOK LIKE MEN).
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intelligent. Must have job or nothing personal, but don’t respond.
